It is a beautiful day. The sunshine is filtering through the doors and windows of the house and I am hoping that part of it will lighten up our hearts and souls. Have been getting no time lately. To sleep most of all, or to pause or to write. It is all one huge ‘ chakka jam’. Client visits, projects, meetings, technical discussions and the running of the house ( how can we forget that?). There is also a tiredness of the soul which cannot be measured or expressed.
We have clients visiting our office which feels very good. For a very long time we were the ones running hither and thither to showcase our work. We have work and we have money to pay the salaries, electricity bills, telephone bills, the daily groceries and books. Yes we need to purchase a lot of books, manuals to understand the work we are doing and it feels very rich to be able to buy them and not use downloaded versions from the net. A lot has been lost along the way. ‘Time with Appu’, ‘my health’, ‘sanity’, ‘serenity’. But what can be done? To live in this world, the bills have to be paid. Just being a human being is not sufficient. Nobody lets you breathe in peace till you make the ‘moolah’. It is umimportant what you sell in the process, ‘ your brain’, ‘ your soul’ or ‘ your body’. Just make the money man. And make it fast. And if you are using dubious ways, just make sure that you do not get caught. Kill but do not let anyone know. That’s the ‘mantra of success’ today. And of course how can we forget that ‘looking good, looking beautiful’ is more important. Look good, look smart even if you feel like shit inside. Even if you are falling apart from inside, show that you are all together, a very happening and very successful man or woman. Fake it to make it. What a world we live in!
Appu’s college fest is over. She has made sure that her team won in the dancing segment by contributing long hours of gruelling practice to her team. well done bebu. Too bad you guys do not allow the parents to come in and watch. I mean parents have a license to visit any part of your life. In India at least!.
Appu is confused about the future course of action in her life. Aren’t we all confused? About what to, when to, how to? Sometimes till our dying day. She is worried that if she follows the dictates of her heart, which is pursuing a career in dance, she would be leaving me alone to run the house and office. Bebzer, do what is best for you. You do not have to become this sacrificial lamb for me. HP is looking after me. Always has. Feel free to pursue your own dream. I mean there will be times when I am overwhelmed and I will try to make you feel guilty but they will be few and you can let those moments pass.
There is gratitude and there is abundance in our lives and hearts today. And for that I am very grateful to the Higher Power.
Thank you HP.
For all that you have given. For all that you have not given. And for all that you have given and taken away.
No questions at all.